Somebody once told me that you are what you eat. I told him that was stupid. If that was true, then if I were to eat Stephen King, I would be the most successful American horror writer of all time. As is, if I were to eat Stephen King, I would be arrested and thrown in jail where I would become bunk mates with Ignacio "Fluffy" Passacaglia and I would have to give up using soap out of fear of dropping it. Some people just have no sense of reality.